How NOT to Behave In A Casino
The online casinos flourished this year because we had to stay at home, but now they’ve finally let us out, there’s only one place we want to go. Yep, you guessed it! We want to go to real-world casinos. If you’ve never been before, the idea of going can feel a bit scary. Most of us get our ideas about real-world casinos from casino films. With their gangsters, high-rollers, and other mysterious characters, it’s a recipe for making everyday people like us feel out of place. But don’t worry, a little knowledge goes a long way, and today, I’m going to teach you how to behave at a casino by exploring the behaviours you definitely SHOULDN’T do at a casino.
Do NOT Take Your Cues From Films
I mentioned above how casino films can influence your ideas about behaviour, but ignore everything they taught you about how to behave in a casino.
Shaken Not Stirred
If you fancy pretending to be a bit of a 007, don’t take his famous, “shaken not stirred”, quote literally. Never throw a Martini across the casino floor. And the same goes for when you’re a bit angry following a loss (and you will lose). Never take your anger out on other customers or staff – it’s a good way to get the casinos to blacklist you and to get an assault charge too.
In Vegas, Everybody’s Gotta Watch Everybody Else
From Scorcese’s Casino, this saying doesn’t relate to you as a player. The quote from the film is, “the dealers are watching the players. The box men are watching the dealers. The floor men are watching the box men. The pit bosses are watching the floor men. The shift bosses are watching the pit bosses. The casino manager is watching the shift bosses. I’m watching the casino manager and the eye in the sky is watching us all”
Don’t sit watching people with your side-eyes. Everyone can see what you’re doing. Have you ever been around someone who’s pretending to look at something by the way they position their head, but you can see that their eyes are pointed at you anyway? They think they’re being crafty, but it just looks creepy.
When people visit the casino, they’re there for fun. They’re not there for you to stare at like some zoo animal. Strategy is part of the fun, but you don’t have to involve other players in it.
So don’t observe other players too closely. It’s creepy and annoying, and in extreme cases, you’re going to make people so uncomfortable that the casino might kick you out anyway. It’s not suave and it’s not sophisticated: it’s weird.
Do NOT Behave Like a Newb
If you’ve never played a particular game before, don’t let your first time playing it be in the casino. Don’t sit at a poker table if you’ve never played before. Some of the other customers might like it because they know they can fleece you, but most won’t like it because you’ll be slowing the pace and fumbling.
You don’t have to be a good player, but you need to know the rules of a game before you play – especially if it’s a table game.
I’d also advise you to get familiar with chip values and colours/shapes. It will make your play smoother and faster.
Do NOT Neglect Personal Hygiene
A lot of people go to casinos for a night out. They love the feeling of doing something glamourous and of being sophisticated. For this reason, casinos usually have a dress code that errs on the side of formal. You can wear jeans and t-shirts, but make sure they’re clean. You’ll find some people wear tux and tails and many wear suits and dickie bows, so even jeans might make you feel out-of-place.
A good tip here is to check the casino’s website for a dress code. If they don’t mention anything, send an email and ask. It can feel embarrassing when everyone’s dressed up except you.
Smelling good is important too. There’s nothing worse than sitting down at a poker table and wondering if someone’s brought the family dog to the table because it smells like they rolled in fox poop.
And, avoid garlic the day before. It’s one of those smells that you can’t notice on yourself, but that everyone else can. I don’t think anyone’s been kicked out of a casino over garlic breath, but it’s bad form.
Do NOT Be Rude
Don’t Show Off With Money
There are so many reasons you shouldn’t do this. First, it marks you out as an idiot and people will take advantage of that, some might even follow you out of the casino if you’re flashing a lot of cash. You shouldn’t be doing it in any walk of life for that reason – getting mugged is no fun. Secondly, it makes you look like an idiot. Thirdly, you look like an idiot. OK, so that’s also the same reason as point one and two, but you look like such a colossal twerp that it’s worth mentioning this many times.
When you do this, you’re just highlighting to people that you’re likely an easy mark or whale.
Don’t Snap Your Fingers At People
I don’t know if this sort of behaviour comes from movies, or what, but some people turn up to casinos and act entitled – like they think they’re some kind of royalty. Never snap your fingers to get the attention of the croupier or waiters/waitresses. You might assume that this makes you sophisticated and special, but it’s incredibly rude and definitely not the way you should behave in a casino.
Don’t act like a nincompoop when you visit real-world casinos and everything will be fine and dandy!